Threat Level at Kindergartens Lowered to Green

Yeah, like that.

Yeah, like that.

My reactions to Michael Jackson achieving room temperature:

1) I made a pedophile reference to him just yesterday. I may have been the last to do it before he croaked. Boo-ya!

2) I’m going to have to avoid cable news until another pretty white chick goes missing. It may take two plus another adulterous governor to stop wall-to-wall MJ.

3) With Farrah gone tango uniform Tuesday and now this, the creepy 70s celeb death trifecta is in play. Anyone keeping an eye on John Travolta?

Update 1: Yes, I know about Ed McMahon. Bethany, meanwhile, said David Caradine’s death started the first trifecta — Caradine, McMahon, Farrah — meaning Michael Jackson starts the new trifecta. All I know for sure is — if I die in a Thailand hotel room I won’t be by myself and there will be mentions of multiple teen hookers and a mound of heroin, not me choking out while…er…you know…all alone.

Update 2: Jackson is still dead as of 11:17 p.m.

Update 3: If you’ve had enough of cable news people kissing a dead man’s behind, here’s a pretty graphic palette cleanser. I don’t endorse any of its homophobic elements, but it is a reality check. Click here.

Update 4: As a result of his death, his London tour dates have naturally been canceled. They were James (9) and Timothy (11).


  1. Dommerdog says:

    So weird. I just emailed somebody and mentioned that the grim reaper had hit the trifecta this week and then wondered if Patrick Swayze will be tomorrow.

    But heck, like Jackson, it could be somebody unexpected – or nobody at all.

    That’s rude of me. Somebody will die tomorrow just like more than three people died this week or two today.


  2. BSG says:

    Shockingly distasteful. Predictably unfunny.

  3. I think you just supplied my blog’s new tag line.

    “Shockingly distasteful. Predictably unfunny.”


  4. Prufrock says:

    “Shockingly distasteful. Predictably unfunny.”

    I like it! :techman:

    What is “Plausibly undeniable” supposed to mean, anyway?

  5. amanda says:

    I think several people “un-friended” me on Facebook yesterday as a result of my inablility to accept Jackson as anything other than a horrific pedophile. “But, I just loved the Thriller video…and he was such a good dancer…it brings back so many memories…”

    Yeah, I bet a number of Jackson’s victims were reliving some memories yesterday, too. Filed under the heading, “Post Traumatic Stress.”

  6. Well I read this post outloud to my team of 18 programmers and trainers of ages ranging from 22 to 55…they all laughed. so distasteful…perhaps…unfunny? No.

  7. keith johnson says:

    MJ died 3 months ago-he just tipped over yesterday.

  8. Frank R says:

    I’m already weary of hearing about him.

  9. TWylite says:

    On the bright side, A Facebook friend of mine pointed out that Abe Vigoda is still alive. He may outlive the cockroaches.

  10. S.E. says:

    @amanda – I think the same thing happened to me. I mentioned him in a list of other fallen celebrities, and didn’t “properly” idolize him. I guess I should have posted the link to the Fark discussion, too, to really clear out my friend list.

    It’s sad that we have one of the biggest sham bills in Congress today, and it’s getting blown off for coverage of a dead pedophile. Mj and Farrah may not have to pay taxes anymore, but I do!

  11. John Cereghin says:

    All this wall-to-wall coverage of a death in our State Media reminds me of what the North Koreans did when “Great Leader” kicked the bucket, or when a Soviet dictator went on to his final reward.